New York Fashion District Poses "Terrorist" Threat
Muslim Cabbies "Attacked" With Pigskin Purses
Big name designers and super-models working NYC's vaunted Fashion District are reporting what one rag trade insider calls a "jihad-like jilting" from Islamic cabbies when it comes to hailing a ride.
It seems hysteria has swept through NY's cab-driver culture stemming from an incident involving a mysterious, 6-foot model, one triggering a crises with the potential to bring a cornerstone of New York's economy literally to it's knees.
Rumors are rampant that a blond runway model, known in the trade as "Porchina", just days ago, reputedly settled her cabfare by pulling two $20's from a $600 pigskin-lined Prada handbag, smiling deviously at the horrified cabbie, and then purring, "Keep the change, Ali Baba."
A spokesperson for the Isalmic Cabbies for the Koran (ICK) has told reporters, "We consider this to be an outright act of terrorism... look, vacuous super-models aren't THAT stupid...even the blond ones!"
"YOUR culture says, 'The 'Devil Wears Prada', he continued, "but WE know, as theological fact...the Devil is IN Prada! Now, my tip-starved brothers are damned if they do and damned if they don't when handed cash from the purses of superficial, status-driven New York women. We spit on the on the Kate Spade-ites! ! "
"It does present a dilemma for the city that touts itself as 'The Big Apple'... that moniker in itself being a Biblical faux pas," said the Rev. Blackie White, author of the best-selling book, "It's The Theology, Stupid!"
"No one wants to see a mainstay of the New York economy held hostage due the insensitivities of a just a few fashionista extremists," says Rev. White. "On the other hand, we have to ask the question, 'How many pigskin purses does it take to make a dirty bomb?'"
Big name designers and super-models working NYC's vaunted Fashion District are reporting what one rag trade insider calls a "jihad-like jilting" from Islamic cabbies when it comes to hailing a ride.
It seems hysteria has swept through NY's cab-driver culture stemming from an incident involving a mysterious, 6-foot model, one triggering a crises with the potential to bring a cornerstone of New York's economy literally to it's knees.
Rumors are rampant that a blond runway model, known in the trade as "Porchina", just days ago, reputedly settled her cabfare by pulling two $20's from a $600 pigskin-lined Prada handbag, smiling deviously at the horrified cabbie, and then purring, "Keep the change, Ali Baba."
A spokesperson for the Isalmic Cabbies for the Koran (ICK) has told reporters, "We consider this to be an outright act of terrorism... look, vacuous super-models aren't THAT stupid...even the blond ones!"
"YOUR culture says, 'The 'Devil Wears Prada', he continued, "but WE know, as theological fact...the Devil is IN Prada! Now, my tip-starved brothers are damned if they do and damned if they don't when handed cash from the purses of superficial, status-driven New York women. We spit on the on the Kate Spade-ites! ! "
"It does present a dilemma for the city that touts itself as 'The Big Apple'... that moniker in itself being a Biblical faux pas," said the Rev. Blackie White, author of the best-selling book, "It's The Theology, Stupid!"
"No one wants to see a mainstay of the New York economy held hostage due the insensitivities of a just a few fashionista extremists," says Rev. White. "On the other hand, we have to ask the question, 'How many pigskin purses does it take to make a dirty bomb?'"
posted by Michael C. at 5:40 PM
0 comments
